3 Steps to Becoming Happier

Think of something that truly makes you happy. It could be a moment of peace, like hearing the rustling of leaves in the wind or the calming presence of a pet. Maybe it’s a hug from a friend or the warmth of the sun on your face. When you reflect on these moments, how does your body react? Do you feel a smile spreading across your face? Does a wave of calm wash over you?

This simple exercise is more than just reminiscing about positive memories. It’s an intentional practice that can help you change the way you experience life on a daily basis. In his book Hardwiring Happiness, Rick Hanson introduces the concept of “taking in the good.” This is the practice of consciously taking time to savor and absorb the positive moments we often overlook. Rather than letting these moments pass by unnoticed, we allow ourselves to truly experience them, soaking in the warmth and comfort they bring. This can be as simple as a small compliment, a moment of quiet, or a small victory in your day. By taking a moment to fully appreciate these experiences, you’re building a foundation for greater happiness.

The science behind this practice lies in the concept of neuroplasticity. Neuroplasticity is the brain's ability to change and reorganize itself based on our experiences. This means that, just as we can build physical strength by exercising our muscles, we can also train our brains to focus more on the positive aspects of life. Over time, our brains will begin to automatically notice the good, creating a lasting shift in our perception and emotional well-being.

So, how do we start making this shift in our daily lives? The first step is to simply become aware of the positive moments that already exist throughout your day. They don’t need to be big, dramatic events. It could be as small as finding a moment of quiet while waiting for your coffee to brew, or receiving a message from a friend that makes you smile. Awareness is the key—taking the time to pause and recognize the good moments that are often overlooked.

The next step is to enrich these experiences. This means giving yourself permission to sit with the positive feelings they bring. For instance, if you receive a kind word from someone, take a few deep breaths and really absorb the warmth of their words. How does that make you feel? Does it make you feel valued? Do you sense a lightness in your body? Allowing yourself to fully experience these moments can amplify their positive effects.

Finally, to make the good last, we need to absorb it. Picture the positive feeling settling into your body and becoming a part of who you are. Imagine it flowing through you, filling every part of you with calm, joy, and warmth. Visualize these feelings becoming a resource that you can tap into whenever you need it. This step is about internalizing the good moments, making them a lasting part of your emotional toolkit.

By practicing these simple steps—notice, enrich, and absorb—you’re creating a shift in how you experience life. Instead of focusing on the negative or letting positive moments slip by unnoticed, you’re training your brain to seek out and appreciate the good that’s already there. Over time, this builds emotional resilience, enhances overall well-being, and fosters a deeper sense of gratitude and happiness.

You don’t have to wait for big life changes to start feeling happier. It’s about the small, everyday moments that, when savored and absorbed, create lasting positive change. So, the next time you experience something good, take a moment to pause and allow yourself to truly appreciate it. Feel it in your body and let it fill you up. With practice, you’ll notice that your capacity for happiness and resilience grows, helping you to navigate life’s challenges with more ease and grace.

By focusing on the positive and absorbing the good, you’re not only enhancing your happiness today, but you’re also laying the groundwork for a more joyful, resilient future. Life may still present challenges, but with this practice, you’ll have an inner well of positivity to draw from whenever you need it.❤️